Oh dear why does it have to be on a weekend?

So I kinda sorta have a retreival date on Wednesday but of course nothing is sure yet because there is still the dreaded weekend to get through and weekends in France are pretty much the time when it might be best to commit murder or rob a person at gunpoint or do whatever crime you have to get off your chest because it's fairly certain that even if the police are working, they're most likely standing around a coffee machine making fun of their boss or trading crass jokes about women in short skirts. So yeah, the weekend.

The last few scans in IVF are the most important ones and the last scan, the big deciding scan is the MOST important. If any of the information is screwed up, the dosage not regulated well, a dose is missed or any other type of miscommunication occurs, the IVF patient can quickly ovulate and the whole cycle will be shot to hell. So, my last scan is Saturday. Yeah, the weekend!

Yesterday when I talked to the nurse she explained to me what I needed to do to get throught the weekend and gave me the cell phone number of the on call doctor at the hospital who will be my liasion after my all-important Saturday scan. The secretary and nurses are not there on Saturday and I assume most of the doctors are gone too so after I see Dr. Stonehenge Saturday morning and he e-mails my result to the hospital I am to hear from this on call doctor before six. If by around six he doesn't call then I'm to call him directly on his cell phone and scream somthing like "HEY, where the @¤%! F*CK ARE you asshole...it's one damned minute past SIX ALREADY!!" because I can't stop picturing him sitting in a café at six drinking a glass of beaujolais and staring annoyingly at his ringing phone, trying to decide whether he should pick it up or not..."no eet will be jeest zee woman ahmereecan which eez very annoying wiss her accent..ouf!"

So yeah, the weekend.

It's looking like I'll have my next scan tomorrow, which is Saturday and then perhaps continue the drugs through Sunday, and then trigger the eggs to release late Monday. This means I will have my retrieval in Lyon on Wednesday if all goes well.

I'm going to be so angry though if these beautiful eggs are wasted on the French penchant for the 36 hour work week. I have worked too hard to get here only to have it lost in some weakly constructed chinese telephone labyrinth, and heads will roll right up to Chirac's oversized feet if this cycle fails because of that.

***

Okay yeah, so that's what a Gonal-F rant sounds like. You just don't want to mess with me right now. I am a volcano of destruction. Watch out weekend shift!